Outside my window......sunshine, grass, concrete driveway, tree lined street of lovely southern style homes. Yes, we have moved to a neighborhood.
I am wearing.....denium capris, green tshirt, bare feet
I am hearing......nothing, absolute silence, unless you count the dogs click, click, click of their nails on the laminate floor, or the sloppy sloshing, of them drinking from the water bowl
I am thinking......that I feel guilty for praying that I wouldn't get called to substitute today
I am thankful for......that I didn't get called to substitute today, I would have been put on the spot and would have felt bad about saying no.
I am hoping....to muster up some energy for my husband tonight
I am going......to try to finish unpacking today
I am reading...."1,000 Gifts" by Ann VosKamp, and I have started my summer reading a little early with a quick little mystery I found recently called "Hooked on Murder". It has a crochet theme to it.
I am creating.....a list of books I'd like to read.
From the kitchen......leftovers or hot dogs, it's time to grocery shop, Oh, but on Sunday I'll be making homemade pasta thanks to my husband and children who bought me a pasta machine for my birthday!
Around the house......still a few boxes and rubbermaid tubs around, and the floors need to be done again, they were clean before we started moving in
Plans for the rest of the week......dentist appointment this afternoon for my son, then he has a birthday party he might go to if he's feeling up for it, have to buy a gift sometime today for the birthday party he may or may not go to, then I'd like to try to make it to church for my crocheting group but not sure if that is going to happen, baseball game Friday night, baseball practice on Saturday morning, church on Sunday.
Pondering these words......."Belief is a verb, something that you do" from the book "1,000 Gifts"
On my mind......I haven't written anything new in over a week. I have a book proposal that I have to finish so the $600 it is costing me to go to the She Speaks conference isn't spent in waste. I keep writing in the back of my mind, my heart always. It's there, nagging at me sometimes and yet I ignore it more often then I care to admit. I have this fear that writing is something that I have gotten all hyped up about in my mind, it is really not for me. I fear I am no good and shouldn't write another word. I shouldn't waste the precious time I have in this world with my family and friends on something that will never become anything worthy.
And yet.....There is this piece of me, this small ever so small corner of my heart that dares to dream that it is worthy. That it could be something. Every day I ignore the tug to write and every day the tug remains. And each day I feel the tug, I know. I know I have to give in to it. I know that if I don't answer, that small little corner of my heart will shrivel up and die. It will cease to exist if I don't give it life. But, and there's always a but isn't there? How? How do I fit it in, with dentist appointments, and baseball games, and groceries and substituting for extra money because writer's conferences are expensive, and sleep, and loving on my family? How? Truth is I don't know. Somehow though, somehow I have to. Because that is what it has become for me. A have to. A need to. It's not going away, no matter how much I think it might.
Picture Thoughts: Here is what our new place looks like
Our room. I won't show the kids rooms, because I didn't check with them first, and also my son's room is still full of boxes and tubs.
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